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Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Deep Thoughts

Life is strange sometimes.

Do you ever wonder if everything {and I mean everything} in your life happens for a reason?Even down to the tiniest thing that you do or say. I don't know if I believe in coincedince...fate...or some other word to describe things in life happening for a set purpose. But I get a little excited when things DO seem like they have a purpose in my life! Do you ever feel like "WOW! That happened for a reason...and it could change my life."? Is it our own mind making things fit into our lives the way we want it too? Or is it God, confirming what we already had thought was right for our lives?

Are you confused and/or curious yet?

Let me explain a little....as best I can anyway!

I have always seen myself with four kids. It looked like we were on our way there too. Especially since Jason and I had talked about trying for another baby, oh probably right about now! But things changed when I got sick...and I am left wondering if this is all in God's plan {actually I don't think God is surprised by this, and I KNOW it is in God's plan...I just don't know how it all fits together just yet}.

In the past, Jason and I had talked about adoption...mainly because I desperately really want a little girl and his family has a very strong history of only having males. But, it never really felt right to adopt when we could have our own healthy children...even though adoption has been on my heart and in my mind for a while now. It just didn't seem like the right time...or the right circumstance. Now that having another baby is basically out of the question...adoption seems more and more like it is being put in our lives for a reason. Like it is finally time. God's plan is playing itself out. All these things over the past few months have happened for a reason.

It's not like we have even started the process or really done anything besides just talk about it. But I feel like "the signs are there", maybe not all of them, but some at least! Which leads me back to what I was saying about the tiniest things in life having a purpose.

There is an elderly lady in our church that I made fast friends with a few years ago. Since I have been sick, she has called to check on me and prayed with me over the phone a few times. But she has really been wanting to come for a visit. Well she called this week while we were gone to town, so I called back and she and her husband came over for a little while. During her visit we were talking about the boys and I said something about always wanting four kids but that we probably wouldn't be able to have anymore. She said she had always wanted four also, but she had to settled for two...because she had ADOPTED both of her children!

I don't know why we talked about this. I have known her for more than two years and we have never discussed it before. But just the mention of it gave me chill bumps. Like she had come for a visit {and I almost put off returning her call} and just happened to mentioned that her kids were adopted because that is what God wanted to happen! Coincidence.....fate....whatever you call it, it gave me some major chill bumps...and a little bit of peace about all the feeling that have been floating around in my head and my heart!

I know it will probably be awhile before we actually put things into motion {or maybe not...God may have different plans}, but just that tiny little conversation...something that most people wouldn't think twice about...seems to have the potential to really change my life!

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Carrie said...

That is awesome! God does put certain people in our lives at the right times...I do believe that! I think that about so much in my own life! Sounds like God's plans are going to be great in your family...I can't wait to hear more...to be continued.. :)

Foursons said...

It sounds like you are very excited about starting the process of adoption, and I think that's awesome! I believe God always has a purpose in everything He does in our lives and it is wonderful that your eyes are open to Him and what He is offering you.

Anonymous said...

Awww...that is a really sweet story!!...God has a plan for everyone!! Isn't He just amazing!!

Emily said...

I am such an adoption fan...probably because my dad and his sister were adopted! I think adoption is an amazing thing. I read another blog (http://poppyjoy.blogspot.com); they have an adopted girl who just turned 1. Their story is pretty amazing.
Yes, you're right, everything does happen for a reason and with God's perfect timing.

ShadowKazuni said...

I've always thought I'd adopt if we ever decide to have more children...I think it's wonderful that you and Jason want to share your life and your love with another child. What a lucky kid! (wherever she is right now) :o)

More Than Words said...

Hi Kelli!!

I believe too that things don't "happen for a reason." Yes, we have free will, but God already knows the outcome of everything!!

I love getting confirmations like that, whether it be through a song, a verse, and even a person. God will use anything or anybody!

Kerri said...

I am a strong believer that God talks to us daily and will share His plans with us. I look forward to seeing God's plan work out with you and Jason. The Lord answers prayers. : )
"For this child I prayed; and the LORD hath given me my petition which I asked of him: 1 Samuel 1:27

Love ya,

Unknown said...

I hope it all works out for you. We may both get our Baby Girl's! We have always felt like we know that we can have children of our own, but when there are so many children that need a loving home why have another when we could adopt. We will be sending off our adoption paperwork{starting our paper pregnancy} soon. If you have any questions let me know.

Tracy said...

That gave me chill bumps just reading it. I know how disappointed you were when you found out that you could not have another baby right now. I hope everything falls right in to place for you and Jason when the time is right. And remember, God's timing is always right.

Jennifer W. said...

It's funny you posted this now. We have always said we would adopt one day. Paul is adopted so it's always been on his heart to do the same and I thought is would be wonderful. We thought we would have our own first and then adopt. Little did we know that the more biological children you have, the more difficult it is to adopt-especially foreign adoptions. We never realy decided where we would adopt from, but Paul said recently he would really rather adopt domestically because there are so many children here being passed over for foreign children and although we all feel for the babies in other countries, it's hard to think about all the overlooked children here. We don't necessarily need to adopt a baby, per se, but we would like a child under 3. I guess we will have to wait and see what God has in store for us, just this weekend I had the thought that maybe adoption isn't in God's plan for us. Not that I don't think it will happen-if He wants it to, it will-but we never really prayed about it like we should have. We just said,'this is what WE want.' We never really checked with God to see if it was what He wanted for us. I would love to share our lives with child grown in our hearts rather than my belly, but I will also accept if that is not in God's will for us. And I don't believe in coincidence-it's called Divine Providence. I will pray for God's direction in this for you!! :)

amanda said...

praying for you and your choices you face. god is good and faithful and he will work it all out!! and i love the pictures with the moon sand. so fun!

Andria said...

Chills Kelli! I think this post sort of gave me chills thinking "this could be me!". Funny, I always pictured myself with 3 kids - although thinking a girl would be in there somewhere! And now that #4 is most definitely "not possible"; that hitting the lottery and adopting a daughter subject is tugging at me just a little. I don't know if either of those will happen BUT they have been frequent thoughts.

I can't wait to hear more "signs" in your future!

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